{"product_id":"original-offensive-crayons","title":"Original Offensive Crayons","description":"\u003cp\u003eAren’t you tired of coloring with “blue” or “burnt sienna?” Us, too.  What you need are Offensive Crayons. Gone are the safe colors like “goldenrod” or “violet.” Now we have “Suspicious Cold Sore Red” and “Privilege” (exclusively for our Caucasian buyers, of course). Say goodbye to your politically correct old color box and welcome this family of blunt, direct and irreverent shades.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e24 Assorted Color(s), or at least 22-23 different, since we used the cheapest labor we could find\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eNon toxic, gluten free (probably), vegan (we think), we might as well call them “organic”\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCarefully constructed by, more than likely, a small, underpaid child in China\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eOUR MONEY BACK GUARANTEE (that they’re actually crayons – no promises for anything else)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSafe for ages 17+ (or whatever, we don’t care)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Offensive Crayons","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42855872299082,"sku":"OC101","price":11.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0269\/1301\/3834\/files\/1_5a43eef4-7a73-4087-9e4a-e5d6c537bccc.jpg?v=1771788741","url":"https:\/\/tirecockz.com\/products\/original-offensive-crayons","provider":"TireCockz","version":"1.0","type":"link"}